I've Accidentally Written A Play!

Writing.  It's an odd activity.  Most of the time you're planning, thinking, procrastinating... and then you have to actually do some work.  I'm currently juggling a lot of writing commitments and they've all come together into one rather glorious mess.  Each day I get up, take the tablets, make myself the one real cup of coffee I can have a day and sit before the laptop surrounded by paper.  And then, because I've got several projects on the go, I choose the one I want to write that day dependent entirely on my mood.  On my moooood.  It is lovely.
Now, one of the reasons I don't solely write (beyond the fact it doesn't bring in enough money) is that this loveliness is entirely transitory.  I'm having a whale of a time at the moment because the writing is going well, the projects are all in a final stage of completion, so it's mostly a job of polishing, spitting and general silliness.  Most of the time this is not the case.
I should be mixing up my day more.  I have to learn some lines for Ghost Storyteller (the first half of the script has been locked and will not change, so I have no excuse not to learn it now) but the writing is going soooo well I just don't want to break the spell.
I'm writing in little bursts only.  I put on an album and work for 45 minutes to an hour (however long the album is) and then stop.  Sometimes I go straight on, sometimes I have a little break.  Food does get eaten.  (I've never understood the whole starving artist thing - food is pretty central to my writing process.  Hunger is not helpful - as the last 24 hours of starvation (and subsequent food obsession) for my most recent sigmoidoscopy has proved.)
The other day this process of random work generation took an alarming course.  I didn't even work on something in progress - it wasn't for the Christmas Storyteller shows, it wasn't even on the long distance radar.  It's just a play I've been picking at for the last couple of years, Complicated Pleasures, which - to my amazement - is up to length, has some great scenes and now just needs a lot of panel beating to get it into the right shape.  In fact, I'm planning on organising a reading of the script next Saturday.  Two days ago I wasn't even thinking of it, now I'm that confident I'll get it finished in a week.  When I picked it up on Tuesday I couldn't believe I'd somehow written a whole play and not really noticed.  I'd even forgotten about a whole subplot.  So, if you're based in Suffolk and would like to help read a play, pop down to the bar at the Quay Theatre, Sudbury on Saturday 15th September at 12.15pm.  I'll put a same float down at the bar for coffee and the like - though this will not be an infinite largess.  It should take a couple of hours to get through and is, I have to confess, a little bit rude.  So, no puritans please.
In other news, last week my cast for The Fantasy Terrorist Variations got together in dribs and drabs to read over the scripts.  FTV is made of three plays - the first is the award-winning Fantasy Terrorist League, which is to be performed by the marvellous Keith Hill - the second is a completely reworked Keynote Speaker, which I had a great session with the fantastic Simon Nader picking the original version apart and putting together again, but better - and the last play, which will feature both the above people of fabulousness, is currently titled The Project After, which is sitting in draft behind me now.  That is the next task.  It's sort of there, it's sort of ready, but it needs sharpening - and when I start doing that sharpening (i.e. when I'm in the mood) I will tell you all about the play.  Let's put it this way, halfway through the read through Mr Nader stopped mid sentence and cried out "Oh, Jesus Christ!"  Which I would hope is the reaction of the audience, if we do our job properly.  I think I've been tempted to produce too much nice theatre recently.  It's time to be a little dangerous.  I mean, it's lovely when a local vicar writes a letter praising my production of The Passion, but it does also suggest that somewhere I've failed.  But this is the subject of next weeks blog - let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Milk Bottle September News: We're Back!

Yes, the Olympics are nearly over, the Summer (what Summer?) has passed and the time has come for Milk Bottle Productions to come out of the duck and cover position and leap up saying "HELLO!"  Yes, we're not dead.  We've three shows coming up over the remainder of the year - one one-off and two full runs for our Winter season at Barons Court.
First up, our one-off, The Shakespeare Delusion, which was postponed earlier in the year due to illness.  This is the first stage in development of a show that we intend to tour much more widely 2013/14 and which involves Robert growing a lot of hair.  Hairy, hairy Robert.  Though he will shave and get a hair cut after October 12th so as to look acceptable for the next show, Ghost Storytelling.

The newly improved Ghost Storyteller is in rehearsal at the moment, having spent the last eight months being polished up shiny and fresh.  It started off as a one-off show The Ghosts of Lavenham last year and has evolved into its current much tighter form.  It is, most definitely, a comic ghost story show.  That is it is more silly than scary - though we have squeezed the odd chill into the air.  We've a couple of tryouts for the show before it returns to Barons Court for the London run.  For those luck enough to catch the new version at Swindon Arts Centre or The Quay Theatre you will get not just the main body of the show, but also extra material that has never been heard before and may never be heard again.  Perhaps.

Lastly, Robert is writing the last play for a trio of pieces collectively titled The Fantasy Terrorist Variations which follows Ghost Storyteller each night at Barons Court at 9pm.  Though it has its funny moments, more than a stab or two of satire, the Variations are serious, challenging plays about our times, about politics, civil liberties, terrorism and religion.  So, there is a slight possibility that Robert may get himself killed.  More on this in later blogs - which will be flowing in a regular way again from now till Christmas at robertcrightonstoryteller.blogspot.com

Tickets for all these shows are on sale NOW.  Even for the Barons Court run for 27th November onwards which can be bought from our good friends at ticketsource.  We advise booking online and printing your own ticket - it's the cheapest and quickest way.  Box office for those and the other venues are below.

Full line up for this Autumn / Winter Schedule follows below...

Milk Bottle Productions Presents...

The Shakespeare Delusion

A Comic Tale Written and Performed by Robert Crighton

Professor Ashborn invites you to share in his latest discoveries and lead you through the terrible secrets behind the man people call Shakespeare.  Did he really write the plays?  Was he really bald?  Did he like cheese?  Using recently uncovered documentation Professor Ashborn can finally tell the true and completely true, truly true, utterly true, true story of the Shakespeare delusion!

Last year’s show – The Ghosts of Lavenham – sold out, so book early to avoid disappointment!

Performing on Friday 12^th October at 7.30pm

The Lavenham Guildhall, The Market Square, Lavenham

Storyteller 2012

Six Weeks of Storytelling at Barons Court Theatre - Christmas 2012/13

A selection of (mostly) comic stories and storytelling from award-winning writer and performer Robert Crighton and his friends.

All Shows - Tickets: £12 / £10 concessions

Tickets for all shows at Barons Court can be bought online at

milkbottleproductions.ticketsource.co.uk

Milk Bottle Productions Presents...

Ghost Storyteller

Comic Ghost Stories Written and Performed by Robert Crighton

Returning this Autumn / Winter following the success of the run last year!  Ghost Storyteller is a lightly comic selection of ghost stories written and performed by award-winning writer and performer Robert Crighton. 

From the ghosts of empty houses, to the personal ghosts we carry around us, this collection is a mixture of the fantastic and the “real”: including the tale of a poltergeist hamster and the pub that cried ghost.

PRE-LONDON DATES:

Wednesday 24^th October at 7.30pm - Swindon Arts Centre

Friday 26^th October at 7.30pm - Quay Theatre

SIX WEEK BARONS COURT RUN

Running Tuesday to Sunday from 27^th November 2012 to 6^th January 2013

Barons Court Theatre, “The Curtain’s Up”, 28A Comeragh Road W14 9HR

Milk Bottle Productions Presents...

The Fantasy Terrorist Variations

Written by Robert Crighton, performed by Keith Hill and Simon Nader

Three Plays - One Subject - Boom!

A series of stories spun from the award-winning ‘Fantasy Terrorist League’.  A man is interned as a terrorist on the flimsiest of grounds, a chancer looks how to make money out of counter-terrorism and the story of the non-existent artwork that might get people killed. The Fantasy Terrorist Variations is a powerful account of fear, the policeman on our streets and the ones in our heads.

Running Tuesday to Saturday from 27^th November 2012 to 5^th January 2013 at 9pm