Revivals and Re-releases: Fresh from the Milk Bottle Archives
Bink!
Written by Robert Crighton
Performed by Cat LaCohie
Molly was left alone a lot. Her parents were always out. So she started talking to herself, to the furniture, to the house. And then the house answered back.
A children’s story... just not for children.
First Performed on Tuesday 13th January 2009 at the Tabard Theatre.
Available to purchase online now.
Out now - listen on audioboom or YouTube
Written by Robert Crighton
Performed by Cat LaCohie
Molly was left alone a lot. Her parents were always out. So she started talking to herself, to the furniture, to the house. And then the house answered back.
A children’s story... just not for children.
First Performed on Tuesday 13th January 2009 at the Tabard Theatre.
Available to purchase online now.
Out now - listen on audioboom or YouTube
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Problem Tree is the impossible story of one man’s father and a tree that can’t exist. A story of the First World War, of running away from your past and hiding in the future.
First performed in 2009, this story has undergone many changes and minor rewrites, but it's now time for it to come out on audio.
Out now - listen on audioboom or YouTube
Countdown to the Other Side
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
A short story, first performed as part of Ghost Storyteller in 2011, telling of the slow fading of a poltergeist and its daily routine.
It helps if you have a good working knowledge of the history of the presenters of Countdown and it's transmission schedule from the late 90's onwards.
Release Date: January - listen on audioboom or YouTube
Teaching Gods
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Winner of the “Best Writing” Award at the LOST Theatre One-Act Festival 2007
The Gods have invaded the University. All thoughts of normal academic life disappear as the campus dissolves into chaos. The flowers walk and the squirrels clean kitchens. Will the agents of chaos win against the hardnosed grey suited form of the Vice Chancellor? What do you think?
Teaching Gods was written in memory of the Middlesex University campus cat. Who had many names.
Teaching Gods was first performed in an earlier version in “the Space” at Sudbury Arts Centre on Saturday 4th October 2003. This revised version was performed as part of a Double Bill with Fantasy Terrorist League at the Quay Theatre on Saturday 17th March 2007 and won the Best Writing Award at the Lost One-Act Festival 2007. It revived in the current version at the Tabard Theatre in January 2009 and has been omnipresent in the repertoire since.
Available to purchase online now.
Release Date: March - listen on audioboom or YouTube
The Examiner of Small Ailments
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
The Examiner of the title is a man who can make little medical problems disappear by singing to them. When he moves into the realm of cosmetic surgery (or rather cosmetic singing) he goes from being a strange curiosity into an international figure of 'beauty' and power.
First Performed on Wednesday 6th May at the Quay Theatre before joining the stories of Teaching Gods for the run at Barons Court in 2009. The show has dropped out of my repertoire as I've been working on a new version. I'm toying with releasing this based on the original text, but we shall see.
Release Date: TBA
The Shakespeare Delusion
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Professor Ashborn invites you to share in his latest discoveries and lead you through the terrible secrets behind the man people call Shakespeare. Did he really write the plays? Was he really bald? Did he really like cheese? Using recently uncovered documentation Professor Ashborn can finally tell the true and completely true, truly true, utterly true, true, true story of the truth behind the Shakespeare delusion!
Audience Comments for The Shakespeare Delusion (2014): “Fabulous production... Just recovering from high octane performance of @RobertCrighton The Shakespeare Delusion #immense... I SO knew where The Shakespeare Delusion was going - & I was SO wrong!!! Chekhov meets Berkoff as performed by Stephen Fry.”
Reviews from 2016: "Crighton gives a masterful and energetic performance as Ashborn... It’s surreal and confrontational, played with an intensity that was uncomfortable at times but compelling." pubtheatres1
"A brilliantly original and entertaining performance." Five Stars from londontheatre1.com
Release Date: September - listen now on audioboom or YouTube
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Winner of the “Best Writing” Award at the LOST Theatre One-Act Festival 2007
The Gods have invaded the University. All thoughts of normal academic life disappear as the campus dissolves into chaos. The flowers walk and the squirrels clean kitchens. Will the agents of chaos win against the hardnosed grey suited form of the Vice Chancellor? What do you think?
Teaching Gods was written in memory of the Middlesex University campus cat. Who had many names.
Teaching Gods was first performed in an earlier version in “the Space” at Sudbury Arts Centre on Saturday 4th October 2003. This revised version was performed as part of a Double Bill with Fantasy Terrorist League at the Quay Theatre on Saturday 17th March 2007 and won the Best Writing Award at the Lost One-Act Festival 2007. It revived in the current version at the Tabard Theatre in January 2009 and has been omnipresent in the repertoire since.
Available to purchase online now.
Release Date: March - listen on audioboom or YouTube
The Examiner of Small Ailments
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
The Examiner of the title is a man who can make little medical problems disappear by singing to them. When he moves into the realm of cosmetic surgery (or rather cosmetic singing) he goes from being a strange curiosity into an international figure of 'beauty' and power.
First Performed on Wednesday 6th May at the Quay Theatre before joining the stories of Teaching Gods for the run at Barons Court in 2009. The show has dropped out of my repertoire as I've been working on a new version. I'm toying with releasing this based on the original text, but we shall see.
Release Date: TBA
The Shakespeare Delusion
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Professor Ashborn invites you to share in his latest discoveries and lead you through the terrible secrets behind the man people call Shakespeare. Did he really write the plays? Was he really bald? Did he really like cheese? Using recently uncovered documentation Professor Ashborn can finally tell the true and completely true, truly true, utterly true, true, true story of the truth behind the Shakespeare delusion!
Audience Comments for The Shakespeare Delusion (2014): “Fabulous production... Just recovering from high octane performance of @RobertCrighton The Shakespeare Delusion #immense... I SO knew where The Shakespeare Delusion was going - & I was SO wrong!!! Chekhov meets Berkoff as performed by Stephen Fry.”
Reviews from 2016: "Crighton gives a masterful and energetic performance as Ashborn... It’s surreal and confrontational, played with an intensity that was uncomfortable at times but compelling." pubtheatres1
"A brilliantly original and entertaining performance." Five Stars from londontheatre1.com
Release Date: September - listen now on audioboom or YouTube
New Works: Spanking New Drama & Comedy for 2017
LIVE FROM THE GET IN!
Written by Robert Crighton
Performed by Abbie Broom, Heidi Bernhard-Bubb, Robert Crighton & Michael Fouldes. And maybe some special guests.
Live from... is a radio comedy and sketch show – live from in front of the set of whichever show is getting in the following week at the Quay Theatre. New material, sketches and monologues streamed live online.
The Saturday 4th March show is currently in the edit.
The UN Special Representative
Written & Performed by Robert Crighton
Mr BEEP BEEP is having a trying day. He was awoken at three in the morning by a team of 'experts' from the UN, because an event on the other side of the world threatens to change his life forever. However, the letters U and N do not stand for the United Nations, and his crisis is more existential than actual.
I've been toying with this idea for a story for years and am finally ready to finish it. I don't know whether I will record this in the studio or in front of an audience, it depends what sorry of funny it ends up being.
Release Date: TBA
Prevent
Written by Robert Crighton
Cast: TBA
A follow up play to the award-winning Fantasy Terrorist League, Prevent tells the story of a young man trapped in a flawed system that criminalises thought, and where the gap between real and perceived threats is not acknowledged.
Release Date: TBA
Written by Robert Crighton
Cast: TBA
'Why aren't you investigating me?' A twisted version of a police drama, where a member of the public insists on being investigated for possible criminal acts. The young DC doesn't want to be wasting her time with him, but even her superiors insist on an investigation. Surreal drama.
Release Date: TBA
Commentary
Written by Robert Crighton
Cast: TBA
A new play about the different interpretations of the making of a film, as made during an audio commentary for a DVD release.
Release Date: TBA
My work couldn't happen without the support of my patrons - if you think you could contribute to the work I create, go to www.patreon.com/robertcrighton and see if you can help.
Also, as there's a lot being planned at the moment, if you want to keep up to speed, why not join my mailing list. I know, so last century.
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