Monday 18 November 2013

The Good and Bad Deeds of Everyone

It's been a week of Everyman action - with a fundraiser show at the Quay Theatre and then a couple of performances at Essex University for their first years.  As followers of this blog will know, I get the audience to write out good and bad deeds before the show.  Here are most of the entries, some are specific things people have done, some are abstract, some are rather moving, some are a bit disgusting... and my favourite less than perfect good deeds/bad deeds are listed at the bottom of each list.

Good Deeds:
Saving someone from walking in front of a car...
Bought a homeless person a coffee and a cake...
Payed for my friends match fees...
Bought my flatmate her shopping when she forgot her purse...
Look after my friend who's having a bad time at the moment...
Help an old person across the road...
Helped a lady lift her pram up the stairs...
Helped an old woman find the car park where she parked her car...
Took in a stray cat...
Visit an old lady once a week so she has company...
I helped an old lady across the street...
I returned a man's hat to him...
Gave someone a penny in Tesco...
Gave someone change on the bus as they were short of fare...
Helped at a homeless shelter...
I saved my dog being attacked by another dog...
I once helped a lost child find its mum...
Saved a man from walking in front of a car...
I gave money to a person once...
Lending money to a friend in need...
Teaching my little sister how to speak and read...
Made exam notes for my friend...
Charity work...
I made [someone] Star Wars cupcakes...
Look after my family...
I looked after an old dude before he died...
Cut an elderly relatives toenails...
Being supportive and being generally lovely to all!
Save someone's life...
I once performed the Heimlich manoeuvre on someone...
Visiting very talkative elderly neighbour...
I write to my sisters...
Gave neighbour a load of logs...
Listened to a friend...
I do the ironing (but not well)...
Cleaning out the Quay bogs...
I took flowers to Mum-in-Law...
Gave a stranger a lift - when she was waiting in the snow for a bus...
Being nice and understanding towards a grumpy neighbour...
Rescue dogs...
I go to my granddad's often and sit and speak to him for most of the day and go to town with him, as he lives alone...
I saved a spider from my bath...

And the less good, good-deeds:
I give my good ideas away and I let others take the credit!  (Is this a good deed? Really?)
Not being horrid to irritating small children... (I hear you brother!)
Taken women out for dinner... (hmmnn, depends very much on the motive!)
Buying my sister 1D tickets... (A bad deed, surely?)
I make other people feel better about themselves by being terrible at absolutely everything!
Did stupid shit to make people laugh...

Bad Deeds:
Forgot to feed my sisters hamster when she was away for the weekend...
I did not clean up my dog's poo...
Day with then girlfriend - told work I was sick...
Broke a plate and blamed it on my little sister...
Caught in a compromising position by my nan...
Ate chocolate bar - put wrapper in brothers bed...
Stole an old woman's seat on the bus...
I stole a necklace...
Punched a friend in the face...
Being irritable...
I stole two glasses of wine...
Objectifying women...
Public masturbation...
Bestiality...
Smoked too much pot...
Sniffed Ketamine...
Scrapped an idiots van...
Killed a fly...
Trod on a snail...
Committed murder...
Farting and blaming someone else...
Getting so drunk I can't remember much in the morning...
Arrested for indecent exposure after Rocky Horror Picture Show...
Cheating at French...
Told a fib to the council...
Road killing a rat...
Slept with a married man...
Pushed an old lady down stairs...
Stole a 1p sweet...
I found £15 in a puddle and took it...
Stealing milk that's not mine...
I judge...

And if you've lost faith in human nature then there are a couple bad deeds that I rather like...

Was a banker...

And...

Voted Lib-Dem in the last election...

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